There is no doubt about it, being a parent is not only an awesome responsibility but it can also be very rewarding and fun- depending on how you grow your children. Parents are given the task of raising the next generation to be responsible and productive in a world that is very unfriendly world.
Being a parent therefore can be a very daunting task, especially for young parents that do not have the support of responsible adults.
However, how a child is raise and how responsible or productive that child is mostly depends on the parenting style of the parent. Baumrind after studying different parents from different background in the early 1960s came to the conclusion that they differ in four important areas: parents’ warmth/nurturance, discipline strategy, communication skills, and expectations of maturity.
#Parenting styles refers to how you choose to raise your children. These parenting styles has a great impact on how your children will mature into adulthood, therefore these have great impact on your children’s success or failure.
How your parenting styles differ and affect your children?
The four parenting styles are:
- Authoritative Parenting
Authoritative parenting is the one that is encourage by experts as authoritative parents encourage their children to be independent, but also set limits and boundaries. Authoritative parents generally communicate realistic expectations they have of their children and potential consequences (for example what could happen if a child disobey parental rule playing in the kitchen), thereby raising a child in an environment that provides both security and confidence; this will no doubt boost your child’s self-esteem.
Authoritative parents set rules for their children and explain the reasons behind them, but at the same time they are very flexible and willing to make exceptions to the rules in certain cases—for example, temporarily relaxing bedtime rules on weekends. The parents not only set rules, but they lead by example, thereby children learn valuable social skills and are able to have healthy relationships with others.
- Authoritarian Parenting
Seen as the reverse of Authoritative parenting, authoritarian parents have a dominating style, and exercise a great deal of control over their children. These parents put great emphasis on conformity and obedience and very little on communicating with their children. They are very strict and will monitor their children without expressing any warmth.
They will set very rigid rules and expects these rules to be adhere to at all times.
Children who grow up in authoritarian homes often become anxious or withdrawn or suffer from self-esteem problems. These children often feel insecure, perform for approval, connect approval with love and may have difficulty in social relationships at school and later in adulthood. Male children may experience anger problems, while female children may become dependent upon others for approval. Although these children may do poorly in school, they do not tend to engage in antisocial behavior for fear of their parents’ reaction. Moreover, these children will also grow up to be authoritarian parents.
- Indulgent/Permissive Parenting
Indulgent/Permissive parents are very attentive who provide a great deal of warmth and interaction, but few rules and constraints. These parents allow their children do as they please without setting boundaries and rarely punish their children. These parents however, tend to be very nurturing and loving and may play the role of friend rather than parent. Although this parenting style often leads to higher levels of creativity in children, there is however, little self-control, few boundaries, and a sense of entitlement.
These children will seek structure to help them feel valued, validated and secure. They may have problems with relationships, and lack the self-discipline necessary for social interaction with others. At school, their work may suffer from lack of organization and motivation. Most of these children will develop risky or impulsive such as alcohol abuse and other risky and antisocial behaviors. These children lacks responsibility, has difficulty with boundaries and commitment, and is unaware of the importance of significant consequences.
Neglectful/Uninvolved Parents is very dangerous to children as it can affect their sense of self, self-esteem, and well-being. These parents do not get involve in their children’s life and have no problem relinquishing their parental responsibilities to TV and games. These parents do not respond to their children’s need and make very little demands.
These children grow up having trust issues in their relationships and problems with intimacy and friendship with their peers. Children raised in this parenting style are usually emotionally withdrawn, fearful, and anxious; perform poorly in school; and are at an increased risk of substance abuse.
Again I ask you the question, is you’re parenting styles hindering or helping your child’s growth? In concluding, if you want to raise responsible and emotional healthy and productive children, then choose Authoritative Parenting style. Parenting can be a very daunting task, but if done right can be very rewarding. Please share your views on share this article with your friends so they do can be responsible parents.
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